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Glossary of Terminology

 

  Rudd called Julia Gillard into his office one day and said, “Julia I

have a great idea! We are going to go all out to win the country voters.”

“Good idea Prime Minister, how will we go about it?” said Julia.

“Well,” said Rudd, “we’ll get ourselves one of those Driza Bone coats, some RM

Williams boots, a stick and an Akubra hat, oh and a Blue Cattle dog.

Then we’ll really look the part. We’ll go to a typical old outback country

pub, we’ll show we really enjoy the bush.”" Right ,”said Julia.

Days later, all kitted out and with the requisite Blue heeler, they set off

from Canberra in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at

just the place they were looking for and found a typical outback pub. Walked

in with the dog and up to the bar.”G,day mate,” said Rudd, to the bartender,

“two middies of your best beer.” “Good afternoon Prime Minister,” said the

bartender, “two middies of our best coming up”.

 

Gillard and Rudd stood leaning on the bar drinking their beer and chatting,

nodding now and again to those who came into the bar for a drink. The dog

lay quietly at their feet.All of a sudden, the door from the adjacent bar

opened and in came a grizzled old stockman, complete with stockwhip. He

walked up to the Cattle dog, lifted its tail with the whip and looked

underneath, shrugged his shoulders and walked back to the other bar. A few

moments later, in came another old stockman with his whip. He walked up to

the dog and, lifted it’s tail, looked underneath, scratched his head and

went back to the other bar. Over the course of the next hour or so another

four or five stockmen came in and, lifted the dogs tail and went away

looking puzzled.

 

Eventually, Rudd and Gillard could stand it no longer and called the Barman

over.”Tell me,” said Rudd, “why did all those old stockmen come in and look

under the dog’s tail like that? Is it an old outback custom?” “Strewth no!”

said the barman. “It’s just that someone went ‘n told ‘em there was a cattle

dog in this bar with two arseholes!”

  

  

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